It should never be a decision you take lightly – marriage used to be such a protected and precious thing. It was the ultimate sacrifice any individual could make. It symbolised trust, honour, respect and most importantly, love for someone else.
There were far fewer divorce rates before our time – problems were resolved through hard work, persistence, compromise and the ability to listen
Listening with the intention of listening, not listening with the intention of replying!
Nowadays, marriage seems to be a fashionable decision – an excuse to hold a shindig, show how much money you have to spare and I suppose, tick the boxes when it comes to being with someone. Suddenly, the values aren’t as honourable for many people anymore and divorce is just paperwork like any other when things get too difficult. Society sees marriage now as a seasonal thing – it doesn’t have to be for a lifetime anymore.
Most of the time, I believe, a situation can be resolved and difficulties in marriage are merely down to miscommunication and a temporary forgetfulness to think about someone other than yourself.
But there are 5 reasons where divorcing may be the best step forward:
When you are constantly (daily) having to think of a reason why you love your spouse
When you are arguing every day over the same thing with no sign of compromise
When intimacy becomes a conscious effort (and not because you lead a busy lifestyle)
When compromise is situational only and not consistent (agreed terms change constantly to suit the individual requirements of one person depending on his/her current mood and desire at any given moment)
When lying becomes a second nature to avoid a confrontation and being honest isn’t worth a conversation out of fear of not getting your own way
When living together has a negative impact on everyone’s standard of living (more importantly children)
Divorce for me is a very serious subject and one I would never consider unless I really believed it was the best thing.
If I felt my children were suffering because of a toxic relationship, if I felt like there was absolutely no resolution whatsoever, then I would consider divorce. If the reasons above were a resounding breakdown of my marriage, I would seriously consider the possibility that divorce may be the best thing to do. But only if I was sure that the reasons above dominated my days over and above the good ones.